Motherhood Is Fulfillment

Singleness is freedom, marriage is bliss, motherhood is fulfillment.

My husband had just left for work a few minutes ago. As early as 5:30 in a very cold morning. My son is still in his room, wrapped in his blanket and still having a good sleep. I am wide awake now, the day as a housewife has begun, any moment from now, the day as a mother will soon up and about. I am still in bed while I take my time to write. It is now one of my most favorite subjects: motherhood.

I have so many great times now, having Burt in our lives. He is growing beautifully and always a happy child. August last year when he was born and our life is never the same again. Our home became baby-scented, our floor a mess of scattered toys, and laughter fill the air. I love motherhood.

Burt at three months in my womb.

Prayer is a start for a miracle to happen. Burt was not just a bundle of joy when I first saw him, but a miracle because I did not expect that I can also become a mother. I felt like God's loving arms wrapped around me. I am so blessed.

For nearly four years, I have all of Eric's attention alone. I always hear Eric says: Mahal, let's buy this for you; Mahal, I have something for you; all for me. Until I got pregnant and I start to share Eric's love and attention to that beloved small creation inside my womb. For nine months, I carried him and taught me not too accustomed to being selfish. And now his existence made me and Eric not just a happy but also a beautiful family, this beloved boy makes me bone tired, and most of the times limp as old-day pasta, but it's worth it.

A holiday that ends up in the hospital.

 I have a difficult pregnancy. I was always in the hospital. There were days that the hospital discharged me in the morning, then I am admitted again in the afternoon. Not only once that the nurses injected me pain killers so I can sleep. My husband spent many sleepless nights with me, either at home or in the hospital. It caused stress when we got the advice that I need to go through a test to determine if the baby have down syndrome. If the test is positive, it is legal here that I can stop my pregnancy. I strongly refused that test. Me and my husband are ready regardless of the outcome. From the day that we found out that I am carrying our baby, we hold it so precious. With my heart that full of faith, I am very assured that God will give me and my husband a beautiful kid.

Burt today.

Hubby preparing the room for our baby.

My husband became a busy father to our "still in my womb" son at the same time a busy husband to his very pregnant wife. Even though my pregnancy was difficult, I have so many happy memories with my husband while we are waiting for the arrival of our son. We eat ice cream together in the sunshine, we drive to the beach,  stroll and watch the calming Dutch sunset. My husband even bought me a big portable swimming pool so I can relax when I am alone. Marriage bind our love but it was my pregnancy that fortify it even more.

I don't have everything in life but in my heart I feel I already have everything. Sometimes, I am asking myself: where would I be now if I don't have Eric? What would I be now if I don't have Burt? I am so glad I have them both.